The Warehouse w/Gillian Anderson, Aishwarya Rai, Natalie Imbruglia, Bipasha Basu and Urmila Matondkar by imitation

Gillian's pride had been destroyed. She had been made to perform the most untold of sexual acts in Minnie Driver's house (see the Gillian-Cat Bell story). Then she was chloroformed and dropped naked and unconscious in the rubbish bin of her 1.4 million pound Notting Hill home where her maid found her AFTER chucking in that day's refuse and hearing moaning among the garbage! After Gillian was taken inside, she began a long recuperation period. Once again, our heroine had become the whipping girl of another devious female!

Back when she played Scully on TV, Gillian had defeated pretty much every celebrity she had taken on but her fierce pride won her no friends and many ladies vowed to take revenge. At the peak of her popularity, her colleague Annabeth Gish had shoved her into the beginning of what would turn out to be an endless oblivion of humiliation. Gillian had beated Annabeth on the set of the X-Files only to be captured and humiliated later, severely enough to lose her higher paying job. On hearing this, her enemies came out of the woodwork and she was captured and beaten by everyone from Andrea Corr to Meryl (friggin') Streep!

Gillian lost a lot of movie roles because she spent so much of her time in captivity. Once, on the cusp of a potential Oscar-winning performance in "The House of Mirth," Gillian had been knocked out and then stripped by co-star Laura Linney. Needless to say, the Oscar voters were present at the beatdown and never even considered Gillian when award season rolled around; but Linney did pick up a statuette that same year! In Hollywood, Gillian had become known as a washed up whipping girl and most here ecstatic!

Things would be different in England, she hoped. Gillie worked out very hard, working her body back to the statuesque beauty that it once was. Her abs grew taut and her arms subtly muscular. She was now a well-oiled fighting machine and her workouts vigorous; she even quit smoking to improve her stamina. She would take care of herself at Hollywood parties; pick herself out of the quagmire of C-list hell she found herself relegated to and work her way back up to A-list status with the other greats of the acting profession; names like Catherine Bell, Charlize Theron and Katherine Heigl!!

But Gillian's enemies hadn't published all the photos they'd taken of her, nor documented other times she'd been beaten like a proverbial drum and they knew she'd come looking for the missing information just as she had with Kim and Ginny. And they were right! The newly peroxided blonde Gillian had just completed stealth training when her maid let her know a friend had arrived to see her. Gillian picked up her towel and dabbed at her sweaty chest as she walked to her sitting room. There, she saw a lissome lady about 5' 6" who appeared to Gillian's practiced eye to be of Indian descent.

Gillian looked her in the eye as she smiled her all-conquering smile and asked, "So, what brings you here Ash?"

Her visitor was, indeed, Aishwarya Rai, a star of the Indian film industry.

"Gillian, you're my only hope! You know Kim and Ginny?" she gasped excitedly. Gillian nodded andAsh explained how there were tons of stories about her being beaten up and forced into compromising positions.

"I'm a regular on their web site now and I have to say, I've come across none of those," the peroxide blonde told the dazzling Indian.

"That's the trouble," Ash gasped, glancing furtive over her shoulder as if worried they were being spied on. "They have not been published - yet! But soon they will be and my career will be....alas...over!" she gushed, throwing herself headfirst into Gillian's lap.

Ash explained the files were in hard copy and are going to be transported to a safe house where they'd be uploaded to a server abroad where it will be safe from intruders and hackers. On a folded slip of paper, she gave Gillian the address where the files were being held in England for transport off shore. They came up with a plan...

Gillian and Ash rode together in the blonde's new van to a spot where they pulled stealthily up at the warehouse under the cover of night. Both were dressed in black catsuits to prevent being seen as Gillian quickly cut a wire on the circuit board of the warehouse fence electric and alarm. Ash cut a hole in the fence and they slipped thru the perimeter defenses of the warehouse. Gillian led the way as they crawled on elbows and knees, avoiding light, to a window. When they reached it, Gillian took a screwdriver from a tool kit attached to her utility belt and quietly pried the window open. They entered discreetly and began their search for the box holding the all-important files. Then Gillian saw a closed door.

"I'll bet you a thousand pounds its in that safe," she whispered.

They stealthily moved to the door and found it open. When they peered inside, they saw a steel box marked: "Kim & Ginny. URGENT ARGENTINA" Gillian flashed her 20,000 watt smile to Ash then she noticed someone approaching in the shadows. She slipped her blackjack from her utility and stepped into the shadows; creeping stealthily up behind the oblivious guard. A womanly grunt pierced the silence of the warehouse and the guard slumped into Gillian's waiting arms. She dragged the unconscious guard back to where Ash was waiting.

As Gillian scanned the room looking for additional guards, Ash checked out the limp figure carefully. "My God!" she gasped in shock.. "You just knocked out Natalie Imbruglia!"

Gillian sensed an ambush if there were celebrity guards protecting the warehouse, "Let's finish what we came for and get outta here! Watch my back!"

Gillian ran to the box and opened it with tools from her utility belt, dropping a few things in her haste while Ash walked to the door to see if the coast was clear. Gillian found files inside and couldn't help taking a moment to for her name. While she was engrossed in reading, Gillian casually rested her hand on her belt where she'd hung her blackjack. She gave a start when she realized it was missing. She started to turn to look for it when it came down on the back of her neck. THWACK! The peroxide blonde's confused expression changed in a second to the emptiness of unconsciousness as her perfect lips parted and her eyes closed. She uttered a soft grunt as her knees unhinged and she dropped tits down to the floor completely inert.

The unseen attacker had been Natalie Imbruglia who had rapidly recovered from her own crowning almost as if this were a planned ambush. She kicked Gillian over onto her back, then again in the ribs to make sure she was out. Her body just jerked and slid in the direction it was kicked. Natalie laughed at the blonde, covering her mouth to avoid Ash hearing her snickers. She bent down, slipped her hands under Gillian's armpits and dragged the limp blonde off behind a row of the boxes. Natalie gazed lustfully at the inert stage star and laughed at seeing her utility belt. She then spoke into a radio strapped to her arm, "Phase 1 complete!"

Ash waited nervously outside, her expression growing to one of anger when she recognized arch-rival Bipasha Basu casually walking toward her. Basu, a dusky skinned starlet from Indian movies is best known for her sexy roles and ample bosom.

She smiled at Ash and said, "So you fell for it eh?" then viciously slapped her.

Ash's head twisted in the direction of the slap; Basu’s hand leaving red finger marks on her cheek. Ash was pissed and lunged at Basu; her hands reaching for Basu's neck. But as she came forward, Basu kicked her in the stomach and when her knees buckled, Ash lost her grip. Basu slammed her shoulder into Ash's chest, driving her backward into the door behind her. Ash slid down the wall and landed on her butt. Looking up, Ash saw that the door behind which Gillian was supposed to be getting the files out the window had been shut. Maybe things were still going according to plan, she thought. This gave her hope as she pushed herself up and swung her fist at Basu's jaw. CRACK! Basu retreated from the attack, her hand rubbing her aching jaw. Ash took advantage and kicked Basu back into the wall, then punched her on the point of her chin knocked her out cold! Ash took a deep breath as she wondered what Basu meant; what exactly did she fall for? She checked the door again and it was still locked tight so she figured Gillian should have the files and be gone by now. That's when she heard the radio on Basu's arm crackle…

"Post B respond...this is Nat!"

Ash quickly stripped the radio from Basu's arm and dragged her behind a wall of boxes where she dumped her. It had begun to dawn on her that Gillian was probably in trouble. She reached for a plastic tie strip on her utility belt to tie the unconscious Basu up, then took off one of Basu's boots and stuffed it in her mouth so she couldn't scream. Ash stealthily moved to the locked door to try it again, laying on the floor to peer under the crack at the bottom to see what was going on inside. Her heart sank as she saw Gillian lying unconscious on the floor; her peroxide blonde hair a complete mess as it rested on the floor. From Ash's vantage point, she could see someone’s hands searching her limp body and heard a voice that probably belonged to the hands. "Why doesn't this bitch carry a lighter?" the voice muttered, teasing Gillian's breasts, then slapping her face.

There was long silence, then Ash saw Natalie sit beside the limp Gillian, light a cigarette and mockingly offer the blonde a drag before blowing smoke in her face. Then Ash suddenly felt someone grab her long black hair and pull with great force! She winced in pain as she turned to see another rival of hers. She jerked her arm back and struck diminutive Urmila Matondkar in the nose. Urmila instantly let go of Ash to wipe the blood dripping from her nose just asAsh let another punch rip that hit short starlet in the stomach! As Urmila’s knees buckled, Ash elbowed her in her spine. Urmila grunted, but straightened up and punched Ash in the face, knocking her down on her back stunned by the little beauty's power.

Urmila ran toward Ash and jumped - landing knees first on her stomach. Ash grunted as all the wind went out of her sails! She’d met her match in little Urmila who punched her in her face so hard it made her beautiful pouty lower lip wet with blood. Urmila stood up and pulled the dazed Ash up by her hair. Ash screamed as Urmila began to repeatedly drive her head into the wall until Ash's consciousness faded away. Urmila's aggressiveness was rewarded and when she let go of Ash, the ex-Miss World slowly crumbled to the floor in a heap.

Urmila talked into her arm radio..."Post B is missing. What's going on with Gillian?"

Natalie responded, "(crackle) The bitch’s still unconscious."

The crackle on Natalie's radio coupled with the smoke from the Marlboro red woke Gillian who opened her eyes to see Natalie walking back and forth smoking. She played possum til Natalie walked close, then grabbed her legs and tripped the songbird who fell on her stomach. Gillian climbed Natalie's back and grabbed her by the hair. Natalie grunted as Gillian punched her spine over and over; continuing to punch Natalie until she had difficulty breathing, then turned her onto her back soNatalie could look up at her through half closed eyes.

Gillian smiled and said..."Good night!" She punched Natalie in her neck; she coughed once and fell unconscious. Just then, the arm radio crackled again.

"Natalie, this is Urmila. Ash is down for the count but I cant find Basu!" which got Gillian worrying about Ash. She went to the door but it was locked. She searched Natalie’s body for a key but didn't find it. Her belt had an array of tools but before going back to pick the lock on the door, she tied Natalie to a post in the warehouse then turned to work on the lock. Nothing she tried seemed to work so she looked at Natalie who had now come to.

"Where are the keys you slut?" she asked the bound songstress. Natalie smiled wickedly and looked at a chalk cross scratched on the floor. Gillian followed her eyes to the cross.

"Ohh you're leading me into a trap again aren't you?" Gillian said, stepping behind Natalie and released her bonds, then pushing her toward the cross.

"Step on it!!" screamed Gillian. Natalie reluctantly stepped on it and instantly a net dropped from the ceiling on top of Gillian as Natalie dove to the floor as a dart was fired from a hidden location into Gillian's left breast. Gillian was standing stock still when Natalie rose from the floor and looked at the paralyzed Gillian with a wry smile.

“You’re in a state of suspended animation! You know everything that’s going on around you but you can’t move a muscle. For instance..." said Natalie as she lit a cigarette and blew smoke in Gillian's face. "You can smell that," then she stubbed out the cigarette on the blonde's right breast, raising the disgusting smell of burning flesh. "...and that! But you won’t feel a thing after this." She picked up an earthen pot and cracked it over Gillian's skull. As the pot broke, Gillian's head twisted to the side, her eyes closed and she slowly crumbled to the floor among the pot shards where she lay in a heap of mud and dirt. Natalie kicked her over onto her back, dragged the net around Gillian’s body and plucked out the dart. "You look beautiful when you sleep bitch!" Natalie chuckled as she tied the net at the bottom like a sack and tied it to a pillar.

Outside, Ash had regained consciousness looking up at Urmila who was searching for Bipasha Basu. When Urmila's back was turned, Ash got to her hands and knees. Just then, Urmila turned back toward Ash and kicked her in the stomach. She took out a tazer from her belt and zapped Ash who crumpled back to the floor in a heap. The beauty queen's resistance had now ended.

"OK, open the door Nat," Urmila said into her radio. When the door opened, Urmila smelled the burning flesh and saw Gillian strung up in the net and laughed out loud. She bent down, grabbed Ash by her breasts and dragged her into the room where she dropped her on the floor at Natalie’s feet. Natalie laughed and prodded Ash with her toe as Urmila went to the net, cut it open, grabbed Gillian’s hair and lifted her head to look her in the face.

"Ha-ha-ha...the great Agent Scully. I used to idolize you!" she said with a smirk at the unconscious beauty, slowly running a finger along the line of Gillian's beautiful jaw.

"These two bitches tried to protect themselves and look how they ended up!" laughed Natalie. She then walked to another door and opened it up. Outside, Gillian's van was idling; awaiting its owner’s return. They laughed as they dragged Ash over and tossed her in the back.

"I wonder where Bipasha is," they laughed.

Urmila got in the van and drove away, leaving Natalie to walk back to Gillian and pick her up. She tossed the limp, washed up star over her shoulder and carried her outside to a waiting pick-up truck. Natalie rolled Gillian into the back, got in the cab, started the engine and pulled away. As soon as she got home, Natalie turned on her computer. She wanted to have sex with Gillian but first she wanted to read about Scully to get in the mood. That's when she stumbled upon an Internet chat room full of fans of Gillian's play, ‘What the night is for.’ Everyone seemed disgruntled that Gillian was too proud to pause leaving the theatre sign autographs for her fans. Natalie sent an email to the leader of the group, asking her to collect the entire group outside "Scully's" pub in London in two hours. As the fans stood outside the pub, a pick-up truck rolled up and Natalie got out. She jumped onto the bed of the truck and called everyone to gathered round the truck and be silent. Natalie reveled in being the center the attention. She put her foot on the side of the truck, lit a cigarette and blew smoke out.

“All you disgruntled Gillian Anderson fans, I'd like to tell you that today I got a new ash tray."

Then she bent and pulled a groaning, half-conscious Gillian up by the hair so everyone could see who it was, then punched her in the jaw to knock her out again. Draping Gillian on her back over the side of the bed, Natalie stubbed out cigarette on the peroxide blondes breast again while Gillian’s fans looked on aghast.

"My ashtray groans sometimes...," Natalie said with a smile. "Well, you saw 'What the Night is For' right?" she asked and the crowd responded with a thunderous, “YES!” "Well, the 'star' of that show thinks it’s for sleeping," she said, then spat on Gillian and dumped her limp body into the waiting arms of her scores of fans.

Gillian's body crowd surfed as her fans madly mauled her unconscious form in their desperate hands. She came to in the wee hours of the morning clad in only her torn undergarments. There were cigarette butts scattered over her and her bra held a half empty beer bottle between her breasts. She woke up to the flash of dozens of England's tabloid photographers and the stunning realization that newspapers all over the Isles were going to be cruel to her - and indeed they were! They described Gillian as a weakling who’d allowed herself to be humiliated by Natalie and who woke up smelling like a mixture of sweat, cigarettes, beer and semen. They were scupulously fair, however, in commending her great body and they took dozens pictures documenting the fact which they reprinted ad nauseum in the centerfolds for the next several weeks.

The tabloids were cruel to Ash as well after they snapped dozens of pictures of her waking up sprawled unconscious on a beach with Urmila posing over her with one foot on the unconscious beauty's breasts. Headlines worldwide blared..."Miss World Dethroned!" Then below that, "Gillian gets whipped again!” “Inside: K&G's editorial about Gillian and Charlize Theron getting beaten over and over.”

Basu awoke in the warehouse all alone! She retrieved the all-important box and took it with her. She now had material to blackmail Ash with, but to use it she’d have to explain to everyone how she’d been thumped by a weakling! A conumdrum!

FOOTNOTE: Gillian realized that, heroic as she was, she wasn’t close to being the brilliant, all-conqueroring fighter she had thought herself to be! (ed., DOH!) Ash realized she shouldn't have messed with the powers that be when she woke up with sand in her crack on the beach. Urmila made Ash apologize for stealing her roles; making her explain to the tabloid reporters that Urmila, “…really is the better woman. And telling them that, “…in the future, all my roles should go to Urmila instead of me.” All this and Bipasha's end of her humiliation hadn't even begun!