The Very Best of Irish... So Far
Centerfold Cafights
Jenny McCarthy Vs Karen McDougal

It was the Christmas season and the United States still had troops deployed in the middle east. That could only mean one thing, a USO show! Steve Harvey was playing the part of the host as he introduced the different acts and did a little standup comedy as he went.

It was getting late in the show and he came out and made an announcement to the assembled troops. “Ladies and Gentlemen I have a very special treat for you tonight!” He paused for a moment until the sound of the crowd reduced to just a simmer. “I have for you not one, but two Playboy bunnies here tonight to say hello and take some photos with you all!” The crowd erupted with a cheer. Many of the servicemen had been away from their wives or girlfriends for months. Yes they had women in their ranks, but desert camo wasn’t very flattering and these women were thought of more like sisters than sex objects.

“Hold on! Hold on!” Steve said quieting the crowd. “I have just been corrected, they aren’t Playboy bunnies.” The boos and hisses were deafening as many of the horny young men had gotten their hopes up. “I’m very sorry!” Steve apologized to them. “You see I have a bad habit of reading my cue cards wrong.” He joked poking fun out of his mishap at a recent beauty pageant. “They are just not any Playboy bunnies; they both were among the elite chosen as Playmate of the Year!” Once again the room erupted in cheers.

“The first beautiful young woman needs no introduction. You have seen her on Singled Out; you have seen her on the Masked Singer. The very beautiful blonde bombshell Jenny McCarthy!” The audience erupted in cheers as Jenny entered from stage right wearing a very sexy version of an Andrew sister military uniform. Steve loved the reaction from the crowd an allowed plenty of time for the crowd’s excitement to die down before he introduced the next Playmate.

It seems that the promoters had heard of bad blood between the two lovely Playmates and had kept them separated up until this point. As a matter of fact the two Playmates still didn’t know each others identity even now.

“The next beautiful young woman also needs no introduction. You have seen her in movies, in magazines, and in fitness videos. The very beautiful brunette Karen McDougal!” Once again the audience went nuts. Karen entered from stage left wearing a very skimpy camouflage bikini. McDougal faced the crowd and snapped a salute to pay respect to the men and women in attendance. She still had not looked across the stage and seen Jenny.

Jenny made sure to stand behind Steve so that Karen couldn’t see her. She mocked Karen’s salute with one of her own. When Karen did look over and see the blonde, Jenny made an exaggerated surprised expression and covered her mouth. She could tell that Karen wasn’t happy to see her on the opposite side of the stage from her.

“So I can see that you two lovely ladies already know each other.” Steve said as he motioned the two beautiful women towards him. As either woman arrived at his side he threw an arm over their shoulders and drew them closer to him. He was instantly the envy of every serviceman and a few service women in attendance.

Karen with a strained smile spoke first. “Yes Steve, Jenny and I know each other. Playboy is a close family and we have been to many parties together.” The minds of many began to wander as they thought what it might be like to be a guest at one of those parties. The hell with an invite to the White House! I rather go to a party at the Playboy Mansion!

“Oh come on Karen!” Jenny began. “These fine young red blooded American men don’t want to hear about some of Hef’s boring parties. They probably rather hear the detail of our last meeting on the beach!” This certainly gained a deeper level attention from the audience.

“By the look on your face I can tell that you remember our last meeting.” Everyone’s gaze did make their way over to Karen’s lovely face. She seemed to be saying “Shut the fuck up Jenny!”

Steve was now very closely paying attention as his eyes washed over both beautiful women. When he was finally able to find his voice he spoke. “On the beach? Karen where you wearing that bikini?” pointing at the brunette. “Jenny were you in a bikini too?” Steve asked.

Karen was biting her lip. What happened between Playmates was supposed to remain between Playmates. Kind of like what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas…. Jenny however had a different opinion and was enjoy the look of discomfort on Karen’s face.

“Of course we were both wearing bikinis Steve, at least to start!” Jenny began. “It was the beach of course!” Now everyone in attendance was very interested in the details. “That was up until I tore this slut’s bikini clear off of her body!” Karen was now seeing red! And like they say, the Devil is in the details!

Steve, and just about everyone else in attendance was now undressing Karen with their eyes. Not that there was much to visually remove, or the fact that many people have already seen both women in all their glory thanks to Playboy. But that didn’t diminish Karen’s look of discomfort.

“Why don’t you get to the part where I tore off your bikini bottoms and stuffed them in your big mouth?” Karen countered. Now all eyes shifted towards Jenny.

Suddenly it was like the two women completely forgot that they were on stage in front of a large crowd. Steve quietly took several steps backwards and the two women turned to face each other. You could hear a church mouse pissing on a cotton ball as the two Playmates squared off.

“Fuck you Karen! It’s time I put you in your place once and for all!” Jenny said as she stepped forward, placing the palms of her hands on each of Karen’s shoulders and shoved hard. This caused the brunette to take several steps backwards because of the force of the shove.

This early victory brought a large smile to Jenny’s face. It looked like her added time in the gym had paid off and she looked forward to tossing the brunette around the stage. Of course she had much more devious plans for Karen once she defeated her.

Karen on the other hand was a little surprised at Jenny’s new found strength. But she also spent a great deal of time in the gym working out and sparing. Jenny would be a formidable opponent, but one she was still confident that she could defeat. Karen stepped forward and returned Jenny’s shove with one of her own. It was now the blonde’s turn to take several steps backwards.

To the audience it was like watching a tennis match. Their eyes tracked back and forth as each woman went on the offensive alternately. They were on the edge of their seats not wanting to miss anything as things heated up between to two gorgeous Playmates.

Jenny stepped forward once again. Karen planted her feet in anticipation of another shove. She was determined not to give an inch as the blonde advanced towards her. But this time Jenny didn’t strike Karen with the palms of her hands. Instead she faked another shove and brushed past Karen’s upper arms with her palms. Karen soon felt Jenny’s breasts smash into hers as the blonde snaked her arms behind her.

The surprise move caught Karen off guard. She had braced herself for another shove, but now with her feet planted, leaning in towards Jenny, the blonde’s breasts delivered a substantial blow to her own. Because she was slightly shorter than the brunette, Jenny’s nipples drove into Karen’s driving them upwards.

The sudden pain in her chest was soon forgotten when Jenny wrapped her arms around Karen, trapping the brunette’s arms at her sides. If the surprise smash to the chest didn’t drive the air out of the lovely brunette’s lungs, the ensuing bear hug certainly did. Jenny was all smiles as Karen let out a grunt followed by a gasp!

Steve’s mouth dropped wide open! He was a mere few feet away from these two beautiful Playmates. As their bodies crashed together, and now Jenny was squeezing the daylights out of Karen, he couldn’t help but stare as their large breasts mushroomed together. He was like a deer caught in the headlights at the magnificent sight before him. Was he supposed to separate them and restore order? If he did he probably wouldn’t make it out of the auditorium alive.

Jenny continued to take advantage of her early success. She squeezed as hard as she could. Her muscular arms straining to crush the life out of Karen, and with her arms trapped at her sides, there was nothing the brunette could do to stop her.

Jenny leaned backwards, arching her back, and lifting Karen’s legs off of the floor in the process. The blonde was rapidly draining the fight out of the brunette. Jenny began to shake Karen back and forth like a rag doll. The audience was in complete shock. Looking at the two scantily clad women on stage at the start of the evening, Karen seemed to have a clear advantage in muscle definition and athletic build. Maybe the blonde really did strip the bikini off of the brunette. Wouldn’t it be great if she did it again!

Feeling Karen’s body go limp in her arms, Jenny returned the brunette’s feet to the floor of the stage to give herself a break. She truly wanted another shot at her fellow Playmate. It was just awesome that she had a chance to “entertain” the troops at Karen’s expense. For good measure Jenny lifted her knee up between Karen’s legs 4 or 5 times. Karen knew she was in trouble!

The brunette was hurting and had to do something to break Jenny’s tight grip on her. She was struggling to draw in a deep breath and she knew the longer she spent in this hold, the worse her chances for a comeback would be. Her mind wandered as she could only imagine what Jenny had in store for her, especially in front of a large audience. Jenny was a true showman and would love to exploit a wounded and defeated opponent!

With almost no other options, Karen snapped her head forward. The powerful head-butt brought tears to Jenny’s eyes due to the pain in her nose. She dropped Karen to the floor and staggered back a few steps. Karen fell to her knees where she immediately started taking in deep breaths, trying to re-inflate her lungs. Unfortunately for the winded brunette, a very pissed off blonde recovered much more quickly.

Jenny stomped towards the downed brunette from behind. Wrapping her hands into Karen’s long dark hair, the blonde used the hold to drag her to standing position. Jenny shifted her feet so that Karen was now facing the audience head on. Karen was barely standing on shaky legs as Jenny continued to blink back tears. “You are going to pay for that bitch!” Jenny threatened.

The blonde let go of Karen’s hair with one hand. She reached forward and grabbed the bottom string of Karen’s bikini top. A slow seductive pull of the string had the audience whipped up into frenzy. The small patch of camouflaged material still covered the brunette’s large breasts, barely! That was of course until Jenny’s hand shifted to the bow that tied the top bikini strings together. “How about a little New Year’s count down!” Jenny commanded of the audience.

On cue they were more than happy to comply! “10! 9! 8! 7! 6! 5! 4! 3! 2! 1! Happy New Year!” Just as the crowd hit one Jenny tugged onto the string, unceremoniously dropping the bikini top to the floor. The auditorium was suddenly deafening with catcalls and cheers. I’m not sure if it was the cool air that instantly stiffened Karen’s nipples, or the roar of the crowd, but the brunette suddenly regained enough of her senses to realize the predicament that she was in.

At this stage, the contrast between the movement of the two women could only been described as the tortoise and the hare. Karen was moving slow and sluggish while Jenny was moving with a purpose. Jenny knew how tough Karen could be in a fight, first hand! She also knew that she had gained a tremendous advantage on her foe, one that she didn’t want to yield. As Karen tried to scan the stage to where Jenny was, the blonde slipped her hands up under Karen’s arms and interlocked her fingers behind the brunette’s neck.

With the full nelson locked in, Jenny started to apply downward pressure to Karen’s head, painfully straining her neck. Karen was in big trouble when Jenny once again leaned back, lifting her feet up off of the floor. The brunette’s head was forced downward until it touched her chest. The hold was painful and further drained Karen’s fleeting strength.

Jenny was enjoying every moment of their little encounter this evening. She knew that she had her foe in a bad way and figured that she would have a little fun at Karen’s expense. With the brunette still trapped in the full nelson, the blonde started shaking her back and forth. Karen’s beautiful breast swung from side to side as Jenny shook her around. The crowd cheered wildly at the site and encouraged the blonde to keep going.

Jenny switched up her swinging to an up and down motion. Now as Karen’s breasts bounced around on her body, Jenny was trying to slap the brunette in the face with her own breasts. Karen was absolutely humiliated and could do nothing to get out of the hold as Jenny was careful to keep her legs out of the range of Karen’s desperate backward kicks.

The blonde was growing tired of holding up the brunette’s entire weight and lowered Karen so that her feet once again touched the stage floor. She still had not forgotten Karen’s earlier head-butt, and she was going to get her revenge in spades.

Jenny reached up with her left hand and was able to grab hold of Karen’s right wrist. The blonde was now able to control both of the brunette’s arms with one hand. This also freed up her own right hand to do a little exploring of her dark haired foe.

With her right arm still under Karen’s, Jenny reached around and found the brunette’s right breast. She took a moment to fondle it further humiliating the brunette Playmate. Jenny’s strong fingers did some further exploring until she found Karen’s stiff nipple. Stiff not only due to the exposure of the cool air of the auditorium, but the close quarter combat with another beautiful woman.

The thought behind Jenny’s movements were more humiliation rather than more pain. She took Karen’s nipple between her index finger and thumb and softly twisted. The brunette’s nipple responded to the stimulation by growing even larger. Jenny shifted her head to the side of Karen’s so that her face could be seen by the audience. She rolled her eyes and made different facial expressions as she continued to play with the brunette’s erect nipple.

The crowd was laughing and Karen was clearly uncomfortable with Jenny’s stimulation of her breasts. She struggled trying to pull her arm free from the blonde, but she was still too weak. Jenny felt Karen’s unsuccessful attempts at escape and this emboldened her. She released Karen’s nipple and her hand started to travel downward over Karen’s muscular abs. If you thought Karen was uncomfortable and embarrassed before, you should have seen her face when Jenny slipped her fingers inside the brunette’s bathing suit bottoms!

Jenny’s fingers probed unchallenged as she looked for Karen’s sweet spot. The brunette nearly jumped out of her skin once the blonde found it and started to seductively caress it. First they were small gentle circles that evolved with intensity and speed as she went. Karen was almost in tears with humiliation. Between the roar of the crowd and Karen’s increased respirations, Jenny was in her glory! With the brunette struggling in front of her and her own pussy pressed tightly against Karen’s tight ass, Jenny was feeling pretty good herself!

Jenny felt that she had Karen close to climax. The thought of the utter humiliation of her foe had the blonde’s own panties starting to dampen. The brunette’s struggles found a new vigor, trying to break free to stop the blonde’s unwanted sexual advances. Jenny was now straining to keep Karen subdued so she withdrew her hand from the brunette’s bathing suit unsatisfied. She figured that she had Karen close and would revisit the very effective tactic in a few moments.

The blonde slipped her right hand behind Karen’s neck and reestablished the full-nelson. The brunette was livid, and now really putting up a fight to free herself. Jenny struggled to maintain control of the brunette. She couldn’t allow her tough foe to get back into the fight. Some of the unspeakable things she had just done to her opponent would surely come back to bite her!

As Jenny felt Karen’s efforts to free herself growing, the blonde decided that her best course of action would be to place her right foot in front of Karen’s. Jenny used the brunette’s struggles to trip her once she was off balance. The blonde still had the full-nelson locked in on Karen who half spun and pitched forward.

Jenny rode her all the way down smashing Karen’s lovely face against the floor, pancaking her lush breast against the stage. With the brunette stunned, the blonde pulled back on the full-nelson bending Karen’s lower back in the wrong direction. With her pussy pressed tightly up against Karen’s ass again, Jenny whispered into Karen’s ear. “I am so going to enjoy fucking you in your tights ass in front of everyone!” The blonde started grinding herself against the brunette’s ass in demonstration. “Maybe when I’m done with your sorry ass I’ll pass it around the room like the collection plate at church. “I’m sure a lot of these horny bastards would enjoy making a contribution!”

In their last meeting Karen had shown a lot better accounting for herself. It was a close hard fought battle, but in the end it was her sitting on top of Jenny. And yes, she really did stuff her bikini bottoms into her mouth to shut her up! Now Karen feared for what Jenny had planned for her after the fight. She took the crazy blonde at her word and knew that she had to break free.

Jenny was focused on breaking Karen in half and causing as much pain as possible to her at this point. With Jenny off balance due to the simulated anal sex, Karen planted her knees and did all she could to try and throw the blonde from her back.

The cruel blonde felt that something was up and decided to smash Karen face first back into the floor. Karen’s struggles ceased and Jenny sat up on the brunette’s ass. The brunette’s muscles rippled under her tanned skin and the blonde wanted to take more of the fight out of her. With her new target acquired, the blonde started hammering straight punches down into the brunette’s injured lower back.

When Jenny felt that she had softened her up enough, she reached forward and grabbed the brunette by the back of the hair. Using it as a handle, the blonde pulled backwards once again inverting the brunette as painfully as she could. Jenny placed one of Karen’s arms over each of her knees and grabbed hold of the brunette by interlocking her fingers in front of Karen’s chin. Once again the blonde leaned backwards inflicting maximum pain to the brunette’s lower back.

When the blonde let go of the chin lock, the brunette crashed face first to the floor once more. Admiring her work, Jenny placed her elbow against Karen’s lower back and placed all of her weight on it. Karen squirmed and screamed in pain as Jenny ground her elbow in deep.

“This is getting good!” one horny Captain said from the audience.

“Wait what?” his friend asked. “I thought you were cheering for Karen.”

“I am!” was his response.

“So why are you happy about her getting her ass kicked?” his friend continued.

“Because I’m the only Chiropractor on base!” he said proudly.

Jenny figured that she had things well in hand and got up off of the brunette Playmate. The blonde walked backwards keeping Karen’s muscular legs between her stance. When she reached Karen’s feet the blonde reached down and grabbed the brunette by each of her ankles. She stood bringing Karen’s legs up off of the floor. Jenny noticed that they weren’t quite center stage so she dragged Karen, tits down, across the rough surface of the stage. She then crossed the brunettes’ legs at the ankles and used her legs to flip Karen over onto her back.

Karen’s body glistened with sweat. The definition of her muscles stood out like a sore thumb. Many in the audience couldn’t believe how Jenny had dominated the fight since the beginning. And this wasn’t lost on the blonde either as her gaze followed Karen’s muscular legs to her washboard abs. Originally the blondes plan was to stomp down on the brunette’s womanhood with the heel of her shoe. After seeing Karen’s taught abs her target shifted as she continued her plan of complete destruction of her foe.

“All that time in the gym and all those muscles aren’t doing you any good huh bitch? You must do sit-ups for hours! Too bad I can destroy them in seconds!” she threatened as she lifted her right leg high. Spreading the brunette’s legs she stomped down on Karen’s belly with her heel digging it in deep. As Karen screamed and thrashed, Jenny just twisted her leg trying to do as much damage as possible with her heel.

All color drained from Karen’s face and her hand shot to Jenny’s foot trying to take some of the blonde’s weight off of the high heel digging into her belly. Jenny saw Karen’s feeble attempts as cute and really didn’t put a whole lot of stock in the brunette’s ability to stop her attack. But Karen was desperate, and Jenny was in for a surprise!

Karen was able to lift Jenny’s foot up enough to place the blonde off balance. With enough of Jenny’s weight off of her belly, Karen was able to twist Jenny’s leg. The blonde felt a jolt of pain in her right knee. She felt even more pain when Karen blasted a strong kick right to the same painful joint. With Jenny in pain and hopping on one foot trying to free the other foot from Karen’s grasp, the brunette used her legs to sweep Jenny left leg out from under her.

The blonde crashes hard to the stage floor, landing flat on her back. She was holding her injured knee with one hand and the back of her head with the other. She had struck her head on the stage floor pretty hard in the fall. Karen’s back and belly were hurting pretty bad from the blonde’s attacks, but she knew that she had no time to rest and had to press the sudden change of events.

Moving and moving fast the brunette dove on top of the downed blonde. Jenny got her arms up and now it was a battle for dominance. The muscles in both women’s arms strained as they fought. Karen was trying to pin Jenny’s arms to the floor above her head, Jenny was trying to stop her. This would have been a much more interesting battle to watch had it taken place earlier in the fight. Karen had gotten the worst of the fight so far, but she did enjoy a more dominant position being on top of the blonde.

Finally it was Karen who had gained the advantage and pressed Jenny’s arms down to the stage floor. Now she was able to use her weight to keep them immobilized and try and catch her breath. When she found her voice she started to threaten Jenny. “OK you cheating bitch you had your fun! Now I’m going to destroy yoooooooooo aaaggghhhhh!”

Karen’s threat was cut short when Jenny snapped her legs shut around the brunette’s injured waist. The blonde’s knee was still killing her, but she was out of options and figured she would just have to suck it up and fight through the pain. Jenny rolled to her right taking Karen with her. Now the blonde could use the floor to help her injured right leg maintain her grip around Karen’s waist.

Jenny pulsated her legs muscles as hard as she could really hurting Karen. The pendulum of the arm battle had now also swung into Jenny’s favor. With the sudden pain in her midsection Karen completely forgot about pinning her foe to the ground and released her grip on Jenny’s wrist.

Karen’s hands were now on Jenny’s legs trying to pry them apart and gain her freedom. Jenny was able to grab hold of each of the brunette’s arms by the wrist and easily pulled them from her legs and held them out in front of her, between the two women. Distracted by another powerful pulse from Jenny’s legs, Karen was at the blonde’s mercy when she started to playfully punch Karen in the face with her own hands. It was now Jenny’s turn to taunt her foe. “You were saying?” Followed by another hard squeeze and pained cry.

Karen was in a bad way, but the brunette refused to give up. Karen pulled her wrist free from Jenny and the arm battle resumed. Of course the blonde continued to try and crush Karen into submission and regain compliance from the brunette’s hands. Karen would not go easy…

Getting herself to her knees, Karen pushed off and rolled Jenny back over onto her back. Jenny panicked a little bit but still tried to crush the brunette. With Jenny flat on her back Karen was able to power the blonde’s hands back down to the stage floor. Karen now started pushing forward, getting her feet under her. Pushing forward through the pain, Karen didn’t stop until Jenny’s shoulders were now pinned to the floor under the brunette’s weight, her ass up in the air. The blonde was losing her advantage with Karen now in control.

“I’m going to crush you until you split open you fucking whore!” Jenny threatened putting all of her remaining energy into one last squeeze. She could tell that it was working as Karen dropped to one knee and gasped.

“Fuck you!” was the brunette’s response as she powered up off of her knee and stood.

Thud! Was the sound that echoed around the auditorium as Karen slammed her knee into Jenny’s lower back. Thud! Thud! Thud! Thud! Followed as the pissed off brunette hammed knee after knee into Jenny’s back.

Jenny’s leg scissor was broken and her legs dropped to the floor lifeless. With Jenny once again flat on her back Karen chose a new target. Still standing between the blonde’s legs Karen dropped a knee to the blonde’s crotch. Jenny’s mouth opened wide but no sound escaped from her lips. The outcome of the fight had decisively swung into Karen’s favor.

Karen covered in sweat and near exhaustion was going to end this here and now. With absolutely now opposition Karen completely stripped off Jenny’s cute little uniform leaving her only in a pair of lacy bra and panties. A double knee drop to the blonde’s belly had her body jack knife at the waist. A punch to the face sent Jenny back to the stage floor.

Karen peeled Jenny’s bra and panties from her body. The brunette dropped down on the blonde’s belly, trapping her arms at her sides. Sitting in this commanding position Karen grabbed Jenny by the throat and squeezed until her big mouth opened. Last but not least she stuffed Jenny’s panties into her mouth, just as she had done on the beach.

All in attendance were truly grateful for the unforgettable show put on by the two lovely Playmates!


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