Alyssa Milano (70%) overpowers Jessica Alba (30%)
Prior to the match, Jessica and Alyssa agreed that anything and everything is legal in this match. The agreement favored Alyssa because of her being part of the ABA and their history of interfering in matches. The two contestants did a little trash talking days before the match about who was going to sit on who’s face. Finally, it match time came for the two of them. The lights dimmed and the theme song for the show ‘Dark Angel’ blared on the speakers Jessica Alba strode out confidently and into the ring wearing a red thong with a matching top that barely covered her breasts. When she got into the ring she grabbed the microphone, turned her back to the camera, put her butt up close to the lense, wiggled and rubbed it a bit saying "Hey Alyssa, get a good look at this fine butt of mine cause your going to be seeing up close and personal when I’m done with you."

As soon as she finished saying that Kid Rock‘s "American Bad Asses" played and out came Alyssa Milano in a black thong with matching top accompanied by the rest of the ABA who all had black thongs and matching tops. "You think you can take me and the ABA all by your lonesome, huh? We face far better opponents than you little girl." said Alyssa with smug confidence when she entered the ring. Infuriated by her statement and attitude, Jessica charged Alyssa driving her to the mat with a shoulder to the gut. She started furiously pounding her face with fists determining to weaken her enough to get a quick victory.

Jessica got to her feet and went to bounce off the ropes, but when she got there, she was yanked off her feet and out of the ring by Jenny. Before she could respond, Jenny hit her with an uppercut to the jaw snapping her head back and causing her to stumble back a few steps where Christina connected with clothesline from behind making her fall to the ground face first. As soon as she fell to the ground, the ABA was on her kicking and stomping every part of her body. Jessica groaned in pain and tried to cover herself but to no effect, the ABA was just too much for her. They were just as determined to beat the stuffing out of her as she was to protect herself. By this point Alyssa had recovered from the beating at the start of the match to come and join in the beating. They soon turned her over and repeated the kicking and stomping to her front side causing Jessica to cry out in pain even more which was music to the ears of the ABA.

The ABA soon tired of their kicking and stomping and Jenny pulled Jessica to her feet using her hair and whipped into the steel stairs going to the ring. Jessica was splayed out on the dislodged stairs holding her battered and bruised body groaning in pain. Alyssa confidently strode over to Jessica pulled her by her hair and walked her over to the steel barriers. Jessica was in no position to put up a fight after the beating she just received as her arms dangled at her side. Taking advantage of Jessica’s weakened body, Alyssa suflexed her into the barriers causing her to holler in pain and hold her arched back which was now in intense pain and her face showed how much pain she was in.

Alyssa dragged Jessica to her feet and rolled her into the ring and followed her in as did the rest of the ABA. Alyssa stood over Jessica and began taunting her and said "What‘s the matter angel girl, huh? Where’s your confidence now bitch? I told you that you couldn’t take us on by yourself." Alyssa once again yanked a yelping Jessica to her feet by her hair. By now the ABA had surrounded Jessica who was barely able to stand on her feet because of her rubbery knees. Her pleas to end the match were met with a fist from Alyssa to the jaw causing her to twirl around to a punch from Jenny and then by Nikki and finally by Christina. The only thing the twirling Jessica saw were punches hitting. She was twirled around by the punches from the ABA members a few times before Alyssa kicked her in the stomach causing her to instinctively to hold her gut and double over. Alyssa placed Jessica’s head between her strong thighs, hooked Jessica’s arms behind her back holding them their briefly before she pedigreed her. The force of the pedigree was so much that Jessica jumped back up to her feet where Nikki twirled her around, put her knee between her legs and arms behind her back, spun both of them around and rammed Jessica’s back into the center of the ring with a spine-buster.

The pain and anguish showed on Jessica‘s face as she sobbed from the punishment inflicted on her. Jessica knew she was finished and in no position to fight back much less win the match and so decided to let the inevitable happen. When Nikki finished the spine-buster, she spread Jessica’s legs, kneeled down and slowly removed the thong that she was wearing with ease. Christina brought Jessica to her knees and held her up as Jenny removed her bra revealing her comparatively small breasts. Jenny kneeled in front of Jessica and looked back and forth between her pair of breasts and that of Jessica’s. Jenny’s lips curled upward as she removed her own bra and threw it aside at which point she grabbed Jessica’s head and buried it in her ample breasts. Jessica’s arms flailed helplessly and her protestations were muffled by Jenny’s breasts and chest as precious air was deprived to her. When the failing had almost stopped Jenny released Jessica and stood laughing as she watched her slump and gasp for air.

Nikki and Christina stood on either side of Jessica holding her arms as Alyssa walked up to her and stood with her back facing her. "Come on bitch and stop your sobbing." said Alyssa authoritatively as she tired of hearing Jessica cry. "Since I‘m going to be sitting your face oh-so-pretty face, you might as well pay some respect by giving a kiss to the two hot ass cheeks that are going to be gracing your face momentarily." continued Alyssa as though speaking to a baby. Feeling somewhat sickened by the fact of kissing Alyssa’s butt, yet seeing that she had no other choice but to comply, puckered up her lips. She hesitantly leaned forward and gave kiss to Alyssa‘s left butt cheek. The disgust showed in Jessica’s face after she kissed the Alyssa’s butt cheek.

"Please, Alyssa don’t make me do this. You girls have already humiliated me enough. Please, don‘t do this." begged Jessica.

"Oh come on. You‘re telling me you don’t like kissing butts. This is a match where I‘m going to be sitting on your face, so get used to kissing my butt because your going to have my butt sitting on your face soon. Besides, you only have one more butt cheek to kiss and then this match is over…for you that is." said Alyssa evilly as she wiggled her and pat her butt a bit mimicking Jessica at the beginning of the match.

"Fine." sighed Jessica as she puckered her lips once again and kissed Alyssa’s right butt cheek.

"Good girl." said a mocking Alyssa. "Put her on her back girls." ordered Alyssa as Nikki and Christina forced Jessica onto her back. Alyssa swayed her hips and pat her butt cheeks a bit just before she got on her knees lowered her butt onto the face of the defenseless Jessica whereupon Nikki and Christina released Jessica’s arms. Nikki, Christina and Jenny attacked Jessica’s now defenseless body and crotch while Alyssa gleefully mauled her breasts and squeezed her tits causing Jessica to squeal but only to be heard by Alyssa’s butt. Slowly but surely, Jessica’s muffled sounds became softer and softer. Soon, no more sounds came from Jessica as she had passed out from Alyssa’s facesit and the unbearable pain of the ABA. The ABA soon stopped their attack and Alyssa stood up from her defeated opponent’s face.

Jenny grabbed the microphone and said pointing to Jessica’s unconscious body "For anybody who wants to challenge the ABA, this is what happens when we get through with them. They get their butts kicked. If anybody disagrees, go ahead and challenge us." With that the ABA strode out confidently to celebrate another victory in their locker room.

Alyssa is victorious.... with a little help from her friends!

Jenny McCarthy, Christina Applegate, & Nikki Cox
The American Bad Asses

Jessica Alba was no match for the ABA